Hate Mail Poetry

The other day I wrote some hatemail poetry. It’s a long, weird story.

UR SERVICE IS PIECE OF SHIT!
IT IS SUCKS ASS!
THE ONLY WAY i CAN VOICE MY DISMAY
AT YOUR BLUNDERING IS IN ALL CAPS!


My punctuation lapses at the thought of your dumb asses
trundling through the halls on a stupidity crusade
My spelling suffers you motherfuckers
so dum you blot out the sun
i rite hatemail in the shade


Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
I hope you get hit by a bus,
Fuck you.


Dear atheist scum,
I know that you are dumb, but I forgive you.
I’ll pray each and every day for an accident you live through.
Suffering in bed, you’ll find the Word instead,
once pain fills your head with dread of
the oblivion awaiting.

With the Word comes proper morals,
you’ll be on the proper side of quarrels,
and will likely cease to teach the things you do.

So hearken to the trumpet,
don’t be such a brazen strumpet,
and know that through it all I’ll pray for you.

Your student.


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